A few questions that I have been asked are;
Why didn't we adopted in the US (domestic adoption).
The raw answer, well raw for me, was fear and not knowing all the facts. I personally witnessed the heart ache of a domestic adoption not proceeding because the birthmother changed her mind and no longer wanted to to have an adoption plan for her baby. I thought that can't happen with International adoption. And usually it doesn't but what I have learned since then is that ALL birthmother's should have the choice to parent or not. There was a time when I was fearful of a birthmother changing her mind. Then I go and chose the only International Adoption country I know of that gives the birthmother the choice up to the moment the plane and baby leave South Korea to change her mind. I now feel and know in my heart that my child is mine because her birthmother could not parent. Not being able to parent is not the same as Not being able to Love. In fact I think that to suffer the heart break that each birthmother suffers when she chooses to make an adoption plan for her child is the ultimate choice of LOVE.
If a birthmother chooses to parent then that child is where s/he is meant to be. When we receive our referral we will know that this face we are looking at is meant to be in our family.
Were we given the option of adopting a girl?
We were. In our particular agency you are only able to adopt from Korea if you have no more than four children currently in the home. Families may also request a girl if they have two or more boys in the family and no girls. Originally we were open to either gender. However, mid 2009 we switch to what is known as the GIRLS ONLY line for many, many reasons. Want to know just ask.
How long will this process take?
With International Adoption my best answer is you never can tell. It's like a roller coaster ride, you go up, up, up and then D-O-W-N and then you hit a bump and then there is a sharp corner and then you go around a loop-de-loop, and turn and then a tunnel and then another turn ... You know somewhere there has to be an end, a place to get off. It has too because there are other's WaITinG tO GeT oN... HOWEVER, we hope and pray to get our referral next year, secretly praying by at least summer. We are ready to go from man-on-man defense to a ZONE defense. Once we get our referral then another batch of paper work starts to bring our daughter home. The estimated time frame for the Emigrations Papers (EP's) and the VISA is anywhere from three months to six months. We promise when we know YOU will know too.
If you have a question - ask IT.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
South Korea
When we first revisited our OLD NEW PLAN we had chosen an agency with plans to adopt from China. With China’s one child tax rule we felt that the need for a child to find a family was overwhelming.
Our OLD NEW PLAN with a bit of changes led us to a new agency and South Korea.
South Korea is a Beautiful Country. South Korea (SK) is slightly larger than Indiana. It lies below the 38th parallel on the Korean peninsula. SK came into being after WWII.
South Korea’s adoption program is the oldest organized international adoption program operating in the US. Children available for adoption are usually around six months at the time you are referred your child. The majority of the children come home just prior to their first birthday. These children are provided outstanding medical care and reside either with a Foster Family or in a small group home within the agency.
At this time domestic adoption is increasing in South Korea but due to some social attitudes toward adoption, nominal government support for single mothers and a trend toward family size reduction there is still a great need for orphans to find their forever family.
South Korea, like many other countries, is highly ambivalent about its successful Inter-country adoption program and it is stepping up efforts to encourage more domestic adoption. Through a series of yearly quotas, SK hopes to reduce their Inter-country adoption entirely. It is suspected that 2012 will be the year that SK closes its doors to Inter-country adoption.
Many countries have requirements for the parents wishing to adopt. We met all the requirements to adopt from SK. Once we knew we qualified we started to learn more about South Korea. As touched on above, orphaned SK children received outstanding medical care. Since the birthmothers usually have an adoption plan in place before or at the time of birth the medical records are thorough and up to date. Most of the children adopted from SK come home between nine months and a year. Because of this we would be able to have our third child also be our youngest, thus not changing the birth order of our children. South Korea also places the children in Foster Homes, where they are loved and cared for by a Foster Mother, Foster Father and sometimes Foster siblings. The love and care received while in Foster Care will enable our child to bond with us once she is home.
After choosing South Korea as the birthplace of our child we have since learned so much about Korea, the culture and the wonderful Korean people and we are so blessed to intertwine such a rich beautiful country and culture into our lives.
Our OLD NEW PLAN with a bit of changes led us to a new agency and South Korea.
South Korea is a Beautiful Country. South Korea (SK) is slightly larger than Indiana. It lies below the 38th parallel on the Korean peninsula. SK came into being after WWII.
South Korea’s adoption program is the oldest organized international adoption program operating in the US. Children available for adoption are usually around six months at the time you are referred your child. The majority of the children come home just prior to their first birthday. These children are provided outstanding medical care and reside either with a Foster Family or in a small group home within the agency.
At this time domestic adoption is increasing in South Korea but due to some social attitudes toward adoption, nominal government support for single mothers and a trend toward family size reduction there is still a great need for orphans to find their forever family.
South Korea, like many other countries, is highly ambivalent about its successful Inter-country adoption program and it is stepping up efforts to encourage more domestic adoption. Through a series of yearly quotas, SK hopes to reduce their Inter-country adoption entirely. It is suspected that 2012 will be the year that SK closes its doors to Inter-country adoption.
Many countries have requirements for the parents wishing to adopt. We met all the requirements to adopt from SK. Once we knew we qualified we started to learn more about South Korea. As touched on above, orphaned SK children received outstanding medical care. Since the birthmothers usually have an adoption plan in place before or at the time of birth the medical records are thorough and up to date. Most of the children adopted from SK come home between nine months and a year. Because of this we would be able to have our third child also be our youngest, thus not changing the birth order of our children. South Korea also places the children in Foster Homes, where they are loved and cared for by a Foster Mother, Foster Father and sometimes Foster siblings. The love and care received while in Foster Care will enable our child to bond with us once she is home.
After choosing South Korea as the birthplace of our child we have since learned so much about Korea, the culture and the wonderful Korean people and we are so blessed to intertwine such a rich beautiful country and culture into our lives.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Why A Blog
Why a Blog, because WE ARE ADOPTING!
My hope is that this blog will record our amazing journey, keep family and friends up to date on our process, and answer questions.
I plan to make our blog public in hopes of “paying it forward”, if it were not for the families who have gone before and blogged about it. This adopting Momma may not be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Now on to what everyone wants to hear, The Adoption. We are adopting from South Korea. We are adopting a little girl. And we are all done with our paper work and we are now just waiting to be matched with our child.
Why adoption? Short answer, it is the absolute best way for us to add to our family. The long answer, after becoming parents we knew we wanted to add to our family. We had a PLAN as to how becoming parents for the second time was going to go. It was a good plan. We would have exactly 2.5 years between each child we had. We added to THE PLAN, that since we had one Winter Baby we would then have our next one be a Summer Baby. So we put THE PLAN into action (so to speak). Well as Life continues to Teach me no matter how much I would love to control MY universe there are just some things that do not go according to plan.
Being just a tad bit impatient, I decided we needed a NEW PLAN. Our new plan was adopting. To us adoption is such a WIN-WIN situation. Our family would grow with the love of another child. A child would have what I believe every child DESERVES a Family. And a Birthmother would have the peace knowing that her unselfish choice brought immeasurable love to others and hopefully peace to her.
We had the NEW PLAN all in place. Application - check. Agency - check. Country - Check. We were ready to go. But as I mentioned earlier, PLANS do not always go according to THE PLAN or THE NEW PLAN. We were expecting … This unexpected change of plans brought us our amazing wonderful L and he IS our summer baby.
Finally, THE PLAN came together and beautifully I might add.
Well since that PLAN came together so well and without a hitch, just like I planned it. We were on to a New Plan, which was the old NEW PLAN. We altered our plan just a bit.
New Agency – Check. New Country – Check. Application in the mail – Check. We were ready! So there you have it. Stay Tune.
My hope is that this blog will record our amazing journey, keep family and friends up to date on our process, and answer questions.
I plan to make our blog public in hopes of “paying it forward”, if it were not for the families who have gone before and blogged about it. This adopting Momma may not be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Now on to what everyone wants to hear, The Adoption. We are adopting from South Korea. We are adopting a little girl. And we are all done with our paper work and we are now just waiting to be matched with our child.
Why adoption? Short answer, it is the absolute best way for us to add to our family. The long answer, after becoming parents we knew we wanted to add to our family. We had a PLAN as to how becoming parents for the second time was going to go. It was a good plan. We would have exactly 2.5 years between each child we had. We added to THE PLAN, that since we had one Winter Baby we would then have our next one be a Summer Baby. So we put THE PLAN into action (so to speak). Well as Life continues to Teach me no matter how much I would love to control MY universe there are just some things that do not go according to plan.
Being just a tad bit impatient, I decided we needed a NEW PLAN. Our new plan was adopting. To us adoption is such a WIN-WIN situation. Our family would grow with the love of another child. A child would have what I believe every child DESERVES a Family. And a Birthmother would have the peace knowing that her unselfish choice brought immeasurable love to others and hopefully peace to her.
We had the NEW PLAN all in place. Application - check. Agency - check. Country - Check. We were ready to go. But as I mentioned earlier, PLANS do not always go according to THE PLAN or THE NEW PLAN. We were expecting … This unexpected change of plans brought us our amazing wonderful L and he IS our summer baby.
Finally, THE PLAN came together and beautifully I might add.
Well since that PLAN came together so well and without a hitch, just like I planned it. We were on to a New Plan, which was the old NEW PLAN. We altered our plan just a bit.
New Agency – Check. New Country – Check. Application in the mail – Check. We were ready! So there you have it. Stay Tune.
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